Hey...you like the new album? that's cool. fuck you motherfucker.

Evil Dead 4, no more.

So this news just came down the pipeline at Dreadcentral.com....

http://www.dreadcentral.com/news/45566/breaking-exclusive-new-evil-dead-film-actually-gearing-production

It seems that there actually is a remake of Evil Dead getting fast tracked by Ghost House pictures (Owned by Sam Raimi).

Some annoying news that is.
First there's just the annoyance at a remake of such a landmark movie. Imagine if citizen kane got remade, film nerds and wannabe film nerds would be up in arms, and the general public wouldn't give a shit and it would make a bajillion dollars.

Evil Dead getting remade potentially has the same effect. Horror nerds and wannabe horror nerds act all butt hurt over it, and the 14 year old twilight and saw crowd flock to the theatre to watch the younger better looking ash stumble through some aborted script viewed through that fucking awful looking blue tinged lens that every horror remake seems to get put through.

Now there is a part of me that wants to be excited for this. Its Evil Dead after all, i have a tattoo from the dvd art of evil dead 2, my all time favorite movie.

the witch in the cellar at the bottom

I prefer to take the high road in instances of remakes, giving them the benefit of the doubt and being cautiously optimistic. And in this case I'm sure I'll come around....eventually.

The problem I have with this news has nothing to do with some fanboy sense of duty to protect my sacred cow. No my friends. I'm in mourning.

See, the thing that most people who lose their shit over pointless remakes forget is that every copy of the original film isn't destroyed when it comes out. But in this case, a movie is getting destroyed. That movie is Evil Dead 4.

How in the fuck are Sam Raimi and Bruce Campbell ever going to get up the gumption to write direct and star in a new evil dead movie when some fucking re-imagining is getting all this time and money dumped into it? How the fuck is anyone under the age of 25 going to be able to figure out what the fuck is going on at the movie theatre when Evil Dead 4 comes out shortly after Evil Dead comes out, and there's this b-movie star pushing 60 cracking one liners about fighting demons?

Dread Central wrote about the remake like it was some sort of good news, but I just really can't see anything to get excited about. Not yet. Not while I'm still mourning the death of what could have been a magical moment for me and the countless other Evil Dead fans not old enough to get to experience a new Evil Dead movie for the first time on the big screen. It could have been (pardon the word) epic! It would have been Ghostbusters 3 and Bill and Ted 3 epic! Rad part 2 Epic! fucking goonies 2 epic! but alas, it wasn't meant to be.

what a fucking bummer.

Yearly reasons (excuses) for not writting. 2011 edition.

So....It's been awhile.

I assure you I've been very busy doing lots of very important things. ( that in no way should have prohibited me from writing )

Change the first...

1) Finishing journalism school.

So i fucking graduated college. I missed the ceremony but I got the handsome little leather folder with a piece of paper telling me how i finally finished something i started. It felt pretty good for awhile there. I was even pretending to be a working writer in my parents basement, editing interviews with some of my heroes (Lemmy) for a western Canadian rag known as Absolute Underground. I even wrote some stuff for them, the last thing being an interview with Electric Wizard front man Jus Oborn. I was later informed after posting the audio of the interview on a certain message board that i came off as sounding scared of him. Something to work on i guess, unfortunately that is the last interview I've conducted. Which brings me to a big ole stinky excuse/change over the past year....

2) Getting another full time job/ quitting the comic store.

So i fucking graduate and then i get right back into the Alberta work force, helping pump the lifesblood from the sticky tar sands by working in a local pipe yard. They were good to me for hiring me back within 3 days of phoning about a job. Upon reflection of the past year i just got overwhelmed with the amount of time i spent in that place. It was a set up warehouse that i helped set up the previous summer, and which i then spent the fall and winter tearing down, leaving me to work outside in the freezing prairie cold. It was a horseshit situation, but the pay was enough above a low rent journalist in rural Alberta/ part time comic store employee that i rationalized it as the right move. In hindsight I'm not so sure. The experience was entirely draining and left me sinking into a deep depression that the bitterly overlong cold season and lack of sunlight only added to. But i did manage to keep writing for awhile through it. And there was a goal to work towards, which brings us to change the third....

3) Moving out of my parents basement/ Moving in with Sarah, my beautiful bride to be.

This was the biggest change over the past year. Well, biggest change on the surface anyway. Moving taught me a little bit about myself. A) I have entirely too much shit B) We should have moved out years ago, finances be damned. Through all the drudgery of new found responsibility i feel, at the very least, not embarased to describe my living situation to people. "I live with my (then) girlfriend above a pub". Sounds so much better than "I live in a dank basement under my parents beautiful home". But through the drudgery of modern living i also appreciate so much more all the luxuries my parents afforded me throughout the years. It's also pretty life affirming to finally realize what i expected all along, I can survive in this world without my parents. I can also live quite happily with the love of my life, which brings us to big change number 4 (and the biggest most grandest change of my life...)

4) Getting fucking Married!

Yeah, i got married. Me and Sarah are married. I don't say girlfriend now, i say wife. She calls me her husband. It's insane. It's so awesome. I shrug it off when people ask if it feels any different or if my life's changed. I always tell them the same thing "Moving out with her was the big change". And partially that's right. We didn't live together for very long before we got married, and that would seem like a bigger change, not only logistically, but just for the fact that the most time we've spent together in a living situation would've been in Costa Rica on vacation. The truth though is that it has changed me. There was a huge perspective shift when we finally said our vows and signed the contract. The Marriage is real now, where as before it was this thing that was coming around the corner. It's good, real good. She's stuck with me now, and there's no turning back!


So that's it, to the both of you who have stopped reading this for a lack of updates, I'm sorry. Now that I'm settled in this new life and feeling antsy and itching to make something, I will hopefully start contributing to this thing on a regular basis again, finally.